@bonedawg said:

I guess the local drug store ran out of KY lubricant LOL.

@lbc-mike said:

I sometimes wonder about this? Why just not pay for it. You have the money. Like Groves did and get busted. At least he was going to have someone else touch him in a massage parlor or hotel room. No Class from Winslow.

Or you could just like, not do it in your car and not call a prostitute.

@the-gipper said:

A couple of questions:

A. Is synthetic Marijuana illegal (in most states)?

B. Is its use really not banned by the NFL?

C. Why would the woman be getting so up close and personal to him to see him making his Funky Monkey be Mr. Happy?

I am sorry...but she would have had to make some special effort to LOOK for him doing that. If she got that up close and personal to him it is because she WANTED to see him make his monkey happy.

And then to call the police? Just fucking walk away, go home, and ride your own camel.

A.) Yes, but only as of recently I think. He probably stocked up on it when it was legal.

B.) Probably is because of A

C.) Because he's an NFL player in an escalade.

Well at least I now know what synthetic weed is...

A. Is synthetic Marijuana illegal (in most states)?

B. Is its use really not banned by the NFL?

C. Why would the woman be getting so up close and personal to him to see him making his Funky Monkey be Mr. Happy?

I am sorry...but she would have had to make some special effort to LOOK for him doing that. If she got that up close and personal to him it is because she WANTED to see him make his monkey happy.

And then to call the police? Just fucking walk away, go home, and ride your own camel.

When Jets tight end Kellen Winslow Jr. wasarrested for possession of synthetic marijuana outside a Target in East Hanover back in November, police were called to the scene because a woman thought she saw him masturbating in his vehicle in the parking lot, according to court documents.

The redacted incident report from East Hanover police shows that on Nov. 19 at 5:30 p.m., cops responded to a call from a woman who said she had parked her vehicle in a spot to the right of a black Cadillac Escalade outside the Target along Route 10. A man was sitting inside the Escalade with the window open, said the woman, whose name was redacted in the incident report. That man would later be identified as Winslow, 30, who lives in Madison.

From the report:

By the time police arrived, an officer found Winslow allegedly "slouched in his seat and moving around." Winslow sprang to an upright position when the officer arrived. When the cop asked Winslow what he was doing, Winslow allegedly said he was looking for Boston Market but was lost.

The cop noticed Winslow was wearing "dark colored" sweatpants and wrote that "his genitals were not exposed." But the cop also noticed "two open containers of Vaseline on his center console" and plastic bags marked "Mr. Happy" and empty plastic containers of "Funky Monkey" scattered throughout the vehicle.

Winslow allegedly told police he smoked the "Mr. Happy" and "Funky Monkey" at his home to relax because the NFL doesn't drug test for it, and that he buys the stuff on the internet and at gas stations. Police say he consented to a vehicle search, and after a few items were seized into evidence, Winslow was free to go.

Lab tests that came back on Dec. 23 revealed Winslow was in possession of synthetic marijuana. He was formally charged on Dec. 30, and last week he pleaded not guilty before a judge in Superior Court in Morristown.

The incident report lists lewdness among the alleged crimes, but Winslow was not charged with anything relating to alleged lewdness.

A 10-year NFL veteran, Winslow just finished his first season with the Jets. He is scheduled to be an unrestricted free agent in 2014.

The entire East Hanover police incident report can be found below.

http://www.nj.com/jets/index.ssf/2014/01/witness_told_police_jets_tight_end_kellen_winslow_jr_was_masturbating_in_his_car.html#incart_m-rpt-1

@miktoxic said:

no...Im not gonna bother explaining if your really that daft.

@nickers said:

you need glasses dude.

you see the world like no other i've ever met.

so you're cool cuz you can do a wheelie or you ninja? yeah how'd that work out for his career?

@the-gipper said:

Maybe in Columbus they are sensitive and over protective....but here in Cleveland on the Browns board if you want to call K2 an asshole...or a fuckup...or whatever....you can do it without having to use asterisks.

i'm down to the beer can folded and pierced apparatus outside the pub. the village is so small one of the top 2 cops is inside drinking while we're outside puffin and he don't give a damn.

prob the only bar in westchester that you can still smoke stogs in. grandfather claused in(not really.....the lady that owns the bar has been there since '72 and she's 93 years old). who has the heart to go bust in and tell her that there is no smoking allowed?

i was going to puff up tonite anyways but now i'll make sure i double dip.

i think by the end of 2014 colorado will be the most populated state per pot heads.

Didn't know it was illegal, maybe in NY. It definitely should be illegal regardless.