Woof Woof (Week 7)
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Beanpot's League
Spooky things have been happening around the Leagues this week and there's not much spookier than the Werewolves of Linden taking over first place.::neener neener, neener neener:: Aaron Rodgers (24) must've been on a sugar high from early treats. TexChainsawMassacre was the victim of the debacle, 82-69.
Greenville Mayhem worked some magic and was able to charm John Beck (13), Darren Sproles (24), and NO DEF (17). (Extra Halloween treats for anyone who can tell us who John Beck is without looking it up.) Mayhem's prestidigitation wasn't enough to fend off the Zombies's WildDawgs. Final: 91-86. Had Mayhem's coach benched DeAngelo Williams and activated Montario Hardesty, the Zombies would have been the walking dead. I wonder why Mayhem didn't have confidence in the pumpkinheads' offense. hmmmm.
Beanpot suffered from tricks perpetrated by Dot the I. Arian Foster (37) was the #1 prankster with Drew Brees (36) not far behind. Dot 119; Beans 80.
Yahoo cranked up the crystal ball this week and predicted a victory for The Average Joe's. The Joes were feeling safe and secure until The Usual Suspects dropped in and Earnest Graham ripped an Achilles tendon. The Suspects employed some sleight of hand and some guy named Ben racked 25 points for the win. Suspects 79; Joes 74.
NavDawg's Browns conked Ballantyne's Buckeyes 73-62.
Believeland bashed the Redneck Roosters 62-56.
Dot the I gets an extra Hershey bar or something for the most points.
Oreo's Hangout
It was a great week for black cats and Oreo was no exception. Clawing wasn't necessary for Oreo to scratch out win #2 for the season. Oreo opened the door to the basement, welcomed the Bronx Browns in, then bolted, landing in 10th place. Oreo's team 79, Bronx Browns 56.
Gocong or Go Home celebrated victory with glowing eyes and handwringing glee, a diabolical laugh echoing through the fantasy gridiron. Kamac 19 had no chance of survival. Even if the 23 points of Plaxico Burress hadn't been left on the bench, defeat was assured. Kamac is off somewhere drinking hot cider and scarfing down chocolate to ease the pain. Gocong 97 and an award of some sort, Kamac 47 sobbing in his cider.
The DD's didn't do anything devilish or deserving of ... deliberation? Dum Dums? Oh... except they won, defeating hammertime 71-63.
dirty hands left the fingerprints of "cheese and rice" aka Sanchez (20) and Ray Rice (six) all over the scoreboard. Lambdo's airshow was left drooling over empty candy wrappers and a slightly singed s'more, murmuring "dirty sanchez." hands 84, dazed Air Show 67.
Beanpot (who should not be counted out this early in the fantasy season) 94
Kentucky Barnburner 90
The Hammer 83
Choo Choo's 79
The Heidi Report
Okay boils and ghouls, Halloween is upon us again so let's dig into the horrors, scares and tricks and treats of this week.
My Helmet's 2Tight 3-4-0 70
why cant we win 3-4-0 91
why cant we win, treated himself to a win this week while Helmet probably dug their own grave by making the bonehead move of leaving their Defense in on a Bye week. So as punishment, Helmet will be cleaning the toilet paper strung though the trees by why ant we win.
why cant we win's top goblins this week were Greg Jennings with 22 pts and Adrian Peterson with 18.
Helmets' top goblins were Aaron Rodgers with 24 and Roddy White with 14 pts.
RunninUover 3-3-1 82
Cleveland Steamers 7-0-0 85
This duel to the death gets this weeks Squeaker Award by a ghostly 3 points. Steamers still has a perfect murder record in this evil season. Personally, I think the secret identity of Steamers is Vlad The Impaler and enjoys seeing our heads on spikes. Unfortunately for RunninUover, he is his latest victim.
RunninUover's top zombies this week were Cam Newton with 20 points and Mason Crosby with 18.
Vlad, I mean Cleveland Steamers top zombies this week were DeMarco Murray with 22 and Mike Wallace with 16 points.
Brownies 5-2-0 113
fatherof3 4-3-0 75
Brownies was heard telling fatherof3, There Will Be Blood. fatherof3 tried his best but the effort was all in "vein". The fear from fatherof3 was almost palpable but with his dying breath he vowed to return from the beyond to haunt the scene of this weeks demise.
Brownies' top minions this week were Adrian Foster with a shocking 37 points and he earns the Viagra Award this week and Ben Roethlisberger with 25 points.
fatherof3's top minions this week were Dez Bryant with 17 and Kevin Kolb with 15 points.
stewartcj1 1-6-0 44
Ballantyne Bruisers 5-2-0 89
During week 7, Ballantyne Bruisers took stewartcj1 up to Boot Hill, threw the noose around the highest tree and left him swinging in the wind in this week's Biggest Blowout Award matchup with a +45 points. After this game the only sounds to be heard were the twisting of the rope and a wolf howling in the distance.
Ballantyne Bruisers' top ghouls for week 7 were Jimmy Graham with 21 and Calvin Johnson with 18 pts.
stewartcj1's top ghouls were Kellen Winslow with 11 and James Starks with 9.
Believeland Browns 1-6-0 67
Football is back 4-3-0 96
Football is back put another nail in Believeland Browns coffin this week. And just for laughs he had a black cat walk across his grave 13 times.
Believeland Browns leading mummies were Josh Scobee with 18 and Matt Ryan with 12 points.
Football is back's leading mummies were Drew Brees with 36 points and Fred Davis with 17.
Peyton's Posse 1-6-0 44
The Korky Butcheks 4-2-1 82
Let the bloodletting begin was the scream from The Korky Butcheks this week. It's the season of the witch and he cast an evil spell over Peyton's Posse and made him leave not 1 but 2 players in the Bye grave this week.
Peyton's Posse was last seen being dragged away clawing at the ground by snarling hounds of Hell, that were foaming at the mouth with anticipation of tearing his flesh and leaving the scraps for the buzzards and his bones to turn a ghastly white.
The Korky Butcheks' top flying monkeys this week were Marques Colston with 25 points and Jason Witten with a lucky 13 points.
Peyton's Posse's top flying monkeys were Neil Rackers with 11 and Chris Johnson with 8 points.
Thus ends the long and dark week 7. Lock your doors, turn on the lights and check under your beds. Are those footsteps you hear behind you or just your imagination? Was it you that left the window open? That terrifying scream was just the cat right? Was that upstairs light on when you left home? Ask yourself these questions kiddies and sleep well on All Hallows Eve. And remember, that cold breeze you feel is nothing, really? Or is it? Muuuaaahhhhahahahahah
Deep into that darkness peering, long I stood there, wondering, fearing, doubting, dreaming dreams no mortal ever dared to dream before. -----Edgar Allan Poe
HAPPY HALLOWEEN BROWNSBOARD!!
The Great Zombie
Hillis iz Boss (SEE league 5 report posted elsewhere)
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Talk about spooky things happening, litteraly less than 3 minutes after I hit send to you with my report, all the power went off in my house. If it had happened 3 minutes sooner, I'd have lost the whole report.
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Zombo said:
Shoot ... I forgot my report ... I won, not sure about anything else ... doubly good report next week...
Z
The omission will be reflected in your check.
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