2012 Brownsboard Mock
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With the 34th pick the Colts select: Coby Fleener, TE, Stanford
I think this is an excellent pick for the Colts to go with young QB Andrew Luck... I'm almost jealous.
Agree...With the 34th pick the Colts select: Coby Fleener, TE, Stanford
I think this is an excellent pick for the Colts to go with young QB Andrew Luck... I'm almost jealous.
Now
With the 3rd pick in the 2nd round, #35 overall, the Minnesota Vikings select:
Kendall Reyes DT Connecticut
The Tampa Bay Buccaneers are On The Clock....
============================================================================================================
ROUND 2
#33-Rams......... Doug Martin RB Boise St.
#34-Colts........ Coby Fleener, TE, Stanford
#35-Vikings...... Kendall Reyes DT Connecticut
#36-Bucaneers....
#37-Browns.......
..............................................End of Draft..................................................
#1-Colts......... Andrew Luck
#2-Redskins...... RG3-is-a-QB
#3-Vikes......... Matt Kalil OT
#4-Browns ....... Trent Richardson RB
#5-Bucs.......... Morris Claiborn CB
#6-Rams.......... Justin Blackmon WR
#7-Jags.......... Alshon Jeffery WR
#8-Phins......... Ryan Tannehill QB Texas A&M
#9-Carolina...... Melvin Ingram DE
#10-Bills........ Michael Floyd WR
#11-Chiefs....... Michael Brockers DT LSU
#12-Seahawks..... Whitney Mercilus DE
#13-Arizona...... David DeCastro OG Stanford
#14-Cowboys...... Peter Konz C Wisconsin
#15-Eagles....... Fletcher Cox DT Mississippi State
#16-Jets......... Mark Barron SS Alabama
#17-Bengals...... Stephen Gilmore CB
#18-Chargers..... Dontari Poe DT Memphis
#19-Bears........ Kendall Wright WR Baylor
#20-Titans....... Dre' Kirkpatrick CB Alabama
#21-Bengals...... Stephen Hill WR
#22-Browns....... Reilly Rieff OT Wisconsin
#23-Lions........ Jonathan Martin OT Stanford
#24-Steelers..... Brock Osweiler QB(commissioner rules this pick stays)
#25-Broncos...... Jerel Worthy DT Michigan State
#26-Texans....... Quinton Coples DE North Carolina
#27-Pats......... Luke Koo-Koo-KaChew-ally LB Boston College....
#28-GB........... Nick Perry DE USC
#29-Ravens....... Harrison Smith SS Norte Dame
#30-49ers........ Kendell Wright WR Baylor
#31-Pats......... Shea McClellin de/olb Boise State
#32-NYG's........ Cordy Glenn, OT Georgia
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OK, I will defer and allow someone else to take the Browns pick:
With the 36th pick in the draft, the Tampa Bay Buccaneers select:
Courtney Upshaw DE/LB Alabama
The Cleveland Browns are on the clock
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Per the CBS draft list, the following are the top prospects left for the Browns to take at #37:
1. Whitney Mercilus DE Illios
2. Devon Still DT Penn St.
3. Andre Branch DE Clemson
4. Kevin Zeitler OG Wisconsin
5. Donta Hightower ILB Alabama
6. Reuben Randle WR LSU
7. Chandler Jones DE Syracuse
8. Mike Adams OT Ohio St.
9. Lavonte David LB Nebraska
10. Bobby Massie OT Ole Miss.
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With the 37th pick in the 2012 draft, the cleveland browns select Ruben Randle wr from LSU.
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With the 37th pick in the 2012 draft, the cleveland browns select Ruben Randle wr from LSU.
Wow...
There's a fair amount of firepower there...
After taking Rieff at 22 forget Adams and Massie...
I think the D-line is set so for me it boils down to:
Take Zeitner and you set up the line for TR...
But you still need a WR and Randle is sitting there...
Hightower would work IF you move DQ to ILB...
David would work w/o having to move DQ...
I know what I'd do...
EDIT:
With the 37th pick in the 2012 draft, the cleveland browns select Ruben Randle wr from LSU.
That wasn't it...
but at least it wasn't Weedon... -
With the 37th pick in the 2012 draft, the cleveland browns select Ruben Randle wr from LSU.
With the 37th pick in the 2012 draft, the cleveland browns select Ruben Randle wr from LSU.
I think I might actually be liking the sound of that pick.
-
Randle sang some Linda Ronstadt to the cornerback from Fla. with his rendition of "Blue Bayou".
-
Randle seems to be sticking to his early second round grade. He is not a cant miss guy but he hasnt hurt himself with the combine or pro day either.
-
So ... Richardson, Reif and Randle ... the Three R's of Learning to Score Points.
I like it.
Book it.
Send Holmgren and Heckert our list of demands.
Zombo
Zombo said:
So ... Richardson, Reif and Randle ... the Three R's of Learning to Score Points.
I like it.
Book it.
Send Holmgren and Heckert our list of demands.
Zombo
To Mike and Mike:
For the love of all that is holy please make this freaking happen.
Yours truly
The Fans have spoken!
-
Along with a copy of your response to watching the Rams game last year.
They need to see that.
Along with a copy of your response to watching the Rams game last year.
They need to see that.
You mean this:
I haven't really gotten a chance to post my comments on last week's game because I've had to travel back, catch up with work, get over a hangover, get over a nasty cold, and, quite frankly, I couldn't put it into the proper words. I think I have found the words:
You fucking douchebag motherfucking cock suckers. How many Fucking times do I have to fucking fly to fucking Cleveland only to watch my favortite fucking team roll over like a bunch of mother fucking fems? Jeezus Fucking Kayrice how hard is it to score a fucking touchdown on the motherfucking St. Louis Rams? You've got a first down inside the fucking red zone and five and a fucking half minutes to go, down by two fucking points, and you run the fucking ball six mother fucking times? After you got downfield by passing the fucking ball? When you have a QB that rarely gets picked off and is having an accurate day on his home fucking field?
Well, maybe that's because we've got Jim Fucking Brown in the fucking backfield? No? What's that? We've got two motherfuckers who weren't even on a motherfucking NFL roster before the season? Well, then, here's a fucking idea: Instead of fucking throwing the fucking ball in the fucking end zone, why don't you fucking hand off to a fucking 3rd string fucking tight end who hasn't even PRACTICED taking a fucking hand off since he was in grade fucking school??? At least fucking admit after the fucking game that you fucking THOUGHT the fullback was in there when you called the fucking play, even though he got fucking injured right before your fucking eyes two plays earlier. And god forbid you give your fucking quarterback the fucking authortiy to change a fucking play when he gets a fucking playcall from the fucking sidelines telling him to hand off to the fucking tight end up the fucking middle on second and fucking goal from the fucking NINE! Worst fucking call in fucking history and no one had the fucking balls, or fucking guts, to fucking change it.
So I'm sitting there with my buddy Mark, who left his wife and two young boys in San Di Fucking ego to spend over a thousand fucking dollars traveling to Fucking Cleveland in Fucking November so that he can see his fucking boyhood favorite fucking team win a fucking football game in their own fucking stadium against a fucking 1-7 shitass Rams team. He didn't even look up his relatives he fucking came just to see his fellow fucking Browns fans and watch his fucking football team finally win a fucking game for him, since it had been ten fucking years since he actually saw them win on their own fucking field. Next to him is my buddy Keith, who flew from FUCKING SCOTLAND to watch the fucking Browns and hope they fucking win a game for him since he spends his fucking vacation coming to Cleveland to watch a Browns game every fucking year and thought it would be fucking nice if they actually fucking won at their home fucking field one fucking time. Behind me is a nice family rooting hard for the fucking Browns and sitting all together and screaming their fucking lungs out the whole fucking game so that they may also actually see a fucking win over a fucking pathetic piece of shit team. One of them is a young man that served TWO FUCKING TOURS OF DUTY IN FUCKING IRAQ and he wouldn't mind seeing the home fucking team beat the 1-7 fucking Tomato Cans for a fucking change. I mean, he put his fucking life on the fucking line for the country, and we don't have the fucking balls to throw one fucking pass toward the fucking end zone for him?
So we are fucking standing there in the fucking end zone fucking seating, just over the fucking visitors ramp with a perfect fucking view of the big, wide-fucking-open end zone. It is thirty feet fucking deep and 160 fucking feet fucking wide, and, with the invention of the forward fucking pass a fucking century ago, the fucking idea would be to fucking isolate one fucking trained fucking receiver and throw him the fucking ball which he has been practicing fucking catching for 20 fucking years (as opposed to fucking handing off to a fucking 270 lb oaf who hasn't seen a fucking handoff since he fucking played in his parents back yard twenty fucking years ago). Every fucking play there is a fucking receiver isolated at our end of the field. The fucking Rams are expecting us to fucking run at them. I say to Mark, "look Evan Moore is going to get the fucking ball right in front of us!" Fucking handoff. I say to Mark, "look Josh Cribbs is going to get the fucking ball right in front of us!" Fucking handoff. I say to Mark, "look Greg Little is going to get the fucking ball right in front of us!" Fucking handoff. YOU'VE GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME. Not one chance at the mother fucking end zone? It's RIGHT THERE. It's HUGE. We've got one-on-one coverage with the fucking Rams fourth string fucking corner. SIX MOTHERFUCKING HANDOFFS IN A ROW?
Well, after all that, all we fucking want is a fucking win. We don't care how fucking ugly or under-coached it is. I have been to this fucking stadium maybe a dozen fucking times since I last saw the fucking Browns win there in fucking 2000, which was the ONLY fucking time I have seen them fucking win IN THEIR OWN FUCKING STADIUM. Sure, I've seen them win in both fucking Jacksonville and fucking Miami since then, but would you FUCKING MIND WINNING A FUCKING GAME IN CLEVELAND FUCKING BROWN STADIUM for me ... and Mark ... and Keith ... and the nice family ... and the Vets ... and the 80,000 fucking people who are paying their hard-earned fucking money to see you beat the gawd-awful fucking Rams?? I even had Season Fucking Tickets, even though I live 1,300 fucking miles away, from 2001 to 2007 and NOT ONCE did I ever fucking see the fucking Cleveland Browns win a fucking football game in Cleveland Fucking Brown Stadium, even though I came up once or twice a year each time.
So, luckily, there are two fucking things a Browns fan can fucking count on: long-snapper fucking Bryan Pointbriand and kicker fucking Phil Dawson. Those fuckers are tried and true each and every fucking season while the rest of the fucking team fucking starts over every fucking year. If there is one fucking thing we can fucking do, it is snap a fucking football and fucking kick it through the fucking uprights. And our fucking defense is holding the fucking Rams pretty well, so we will take the the gimme fucking chip shot field goal and if we can keep the fucking Rams out of fucking field goal range for two fucking minutes we will finally win a fucking home fucking game that I fucking paid dearly to see.
Yet ... knowing those fucking guys are automatic, and this was a fucking "chippie" ... I still fucking found myself mouthing a "Hail Mary" to myself as the Browns set up for that fucking field goal, because I had fucking seen too many things. We all had fucken seen too many fucken things. As if she cared. She's got starving children and fucking pedophiles running around, why pray about football? Because it's THE CLEVELAND FUCKING BROWNS and EVERY FUCKING WEEK I TELL EVERYBODY HOW FUCKING PROUD I AM TO BE A CLEVELAND FUCKING BROWNS FAN and COULD THEY JUST FUCKING ONCE, MOTHERFUCKING ONCE, PUT SOMEBODY THE FUCK AWAY IN FRONT OF MY OWN FUCKING EYES??
Selfish, I know. That's the thought I had as I watched in unspeakable fucking horror as the ball slowly fucking dribbled back to poor fucking Maynard, the fucking holder. He did his fucking best to get it fucking upright but by then the fucking enemy was breaking through and fucking Phil's timing was off. But still ... I hear a "BOOM" ... Fucking Phil blasts the ball, we all look over, there is a brief cheer .. followed by the biggest, longest, saddest, motherfucking groan you will ever fucking hear.
Not fucking again.
Fuck no, Fuck no, Fuck no!
They couldn't FUCKING EXECUTE A FUCKING GAWD DAMN FUCKING FIELD GOAL FROM THE FUCKING FIVE YARD LINE? A Field Goal that they just spent three FUCKING MINUTES SETTING UP BY RUNNING STRAIGHT FUCKING INTO THE LINE SIX FUCKING TIMES WITH FUCKING TIGHT ENDS AND FUCKING ARENA LEAGUE BACKS? A field goal that was so FUCKING IMPORTANT THAT THEY COULDN'T FUCKING RISK THROWING ONE FUCKING PASS INTO THAT BIG FUCKING WIDE FUCKING OPEN END ZONE GUARDED BY FOURTH FUCKING STRING FUCKING RAMS CORNERFUCKINGBACKS? They couldn't execute THAT fucking field goal????
What the FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK?????????????????????????????!!!
Seriously ... what the Fuck?
Zombo
--Total Trap Game for the Jaguars this week, though.
-
Along with a copy of your response to watching the Rams game last year.
They need to see that.
You mean this:
I haven't really gotten a chance to post my comments on last week's game because I've had to travel back, catch up with work, get over a hangover, get over a nasty cold, and, quite frankly, I couldn't put it into the proper words. I think I have found the words:
You fucking douchebag motherfucking cock suckers. How many Fucking times do I have to fucking fly to fucking Cleveland only to watch my favortite fucking team roll over like a bunch of mother fucking fems? Jeezus Fucking Kayrice how hard is it to score a fucking touchdown on the motherfucking St. Louis Rams? You've got a first down inside the fucking red zone and five and a fucking half minutes to go, down by two fucking points, and you run the fucking ball six mother fucking times? After you got downfield by passing the fucking ball? When you have a QB that rarely gets picked off and is having an accurate day on his home fucking field?
Well, maybe that's because we've got Jim Fucking Brown in the fucking backfield? No? What's that? We've got two motherfuckers who weren't even on a motherfucking NFL roster before the season? Well, then, here's a fucking idea: Instead of fucking throwing the fucking ball in the fucking end zone, why don't you fucking hand off to a fucking 3rd string fucking tight end who hasn't even PRACTICED taking a fucking hand off since he was in grade fucking school??? At least fucking admit after the fucking game that you fucking THOUGHT the fullback was in there when you called the fucking play, even though he got fucking injured right before your fucking eyes two plays earlier. And god forbid you give your fucking quarterback the fucking authortiy to change a fucking play when he gets a fucking playcall from the fucking sidelines telling him to hand off to the fucking tight end up the fucking middle on second and fucking goal from the fucking NINE! Worst fucking call in fucking history and no one had the fucking balls, or fucking guts, to fucking change it.
So I'm sitting there with my buddy Mark, who left his wife and two young boys in San Di Fucking ego to spend over a thousand fucking dollars traveling to Fucking Cleveland in Fucking November so that he can see his fucking boyhood favorite fucking team win a fucking football game in their own fucking stadium against a fucking 1-7 shitass Rams team. He didn't even look up his relatives he fucking came just to see his fellow fucking Browns fans and watch his fucking football team finally win a fucking game for him, since it had been ten fucking years since he actually saw them win on their own fucking field. Next to him is my buddy Keith, who flew from FUCKING SCOTLAND to watch the fucking Browns and hope they fucking win a game for him since he spends his fucking vacation coming to Cleveland to watch a Browns game every fucking year and thought it would be fucking nice if they actually fucking won at their home fucking field one fucking time. Behind me is a nice family rooting hard for the fucking Browns and sitting all together and screaming their fucking lungs out the whole fucking game so that they may also actually see a fucking win over a fucking pathetic piece of shit team. One of them is a young man that served TWO FUCKING TOURS OF DUTY IN FUCKING IRAQ and he wouldn't mind seeing the home fucking team beat the 1-7 fucking Tomato Cans for a fucking change. I mean, he put his fucking life on the fucking line for the country, and we don't have the fucking balls to throw one fucking pass toward the fucking end zone for him?
So we are fucking standing there in the fucking end zone fucking seating, just over the fucking visitors ramp with a perfect fucking view of the big, wide-fucking-open end zone. It is thirty feet fucking deep and 160 fucking feet fucking wide, and, with the invention of the forward fucking pass a fucking century ago, the fucking idea would be to fucking isolate one fucking trained fucking receiver and throw him the fucking ball which he has been practicing fucking catching for 20 fucking years (as opposed to fucking handing off to a fucking 270 lb oaf who hasn't seen a fucking handoff since he fucking played in his parents back yard twenty fucking years ago). Every fucking play there is a fucking receiver isolated at our end of the field. The fucking Rams are expecting us to fucking run at them. I say to Mark, "look Evan Moore is going to get the fucking ball right in front of us!" Fucking handoff. I say to Mark, "look Josh Cribbs is going to get the fucking ball right in front of us!" Fucking handoff. I say to Mark, "look Greg Little is going to get the fucking ball right in front of us!" Fucking handoff. YOU'VE GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME. Not one chance at the mother fucking end zone? It's RIGHT THERE. It's HUGE. We've got one-on-one coverage with the fucking Rams fourth string fucking corner. SIX MOTHERFUCKING HANDOFFS IN A ROW?
Well, after all that, all we fucking want is a fucking win. We don't care how fucking ugly or under-coached it is. I have been to this fucking stadium maybe a dozen fucking times since I last saw the fucking Browns win there in fucking 2000, which was the ONLY fucking time I have seen them fucking win IN THEIR OWN FUCKING STADIUM. Sure, I've seen them win in both fucking Jacksonville and fucking Miami since then, but would you FUCKING MIND WINNING A FUCKING GAME IN CLEVELAND FUCKING BROWN STADIUM for me ... and Mark ... and Keith ... and the nice family ... and the Vets ... and the 80,000 fucking people who are paying their hard-earned fucking money to see you beat the gawd-awful fucking Rams?? I even had Season Fucking Tickets, even though I live 1,300 fucking miles away, from 2001 to 2007 and NOT ONCE did I ever fucking see the fucking Cleveland Browns win a fucking football game in Cleveland Fucking Brown Stadium, even though I came up once or twice a year each time.
So, luckily, there are two fucking things a Browns fan can fucking count on: long-snapper fucking Bryan Pointbriand and kicker fucking Phil Dawson. Those fuckers are tried and true each and every fucking season while the rest of the fucking team fucking starts over every fucking year. If there is one fucking thing we can fucking do, it is snap a fucking football and fucking kick it through the fucking uprights. And our fucking defense is holding the fucking Rams pretty well, so we will take the the gimme fucking chip shot field goal and if we can keep the fucking Rams out of fucking field goal range for two fucking minutes we will finally win a fucking home fucking game that I fucking paid dearly to see.
Yet ... knowing those fucking guys are automatic, and this was a fucking "chippie" ... I still fucking found myself mouthing a "Hail Mary" to myself as the Browns set up for that fucking field goal, because I had fucking seen too many things. We all had fucken seen too many fucken things. As if she cared. She's got starving children and fucking pedophiles running around, why pray about football? Because it's THE CLEVELAND FUCKING BROWNS and EVERY FUCKING WEEK I TELL EVERYBODY HOW FUCKING PROUD I AM TO BE A CLEVELAND FUCKING BROWNS FAN and COULD THEY JUST FUCKING ONCE, MOTHERFUCKING ONCE, PUT SOMEBODY THE FUCK AWAY IN FRONT OF MY OWN FUCKING EYES??
Selfish, I know. That's the thought I had as I watched in unspeakable fucking horror as the ball slowly fucking dribbled back to poor fucking Maynard, the fucking holder. He did his fucking best to get it fucking upright but by then the fucking enemy was breaking through and fucking Phil's timing was off. But still ... I hear a "BOOM" ... Fucking Phil blasts the ball, we all look over, there is a brief cheer .. followed by the biggest, longest, saddest, motherfucking groan you will ever fucking hear.
Not fucking again.
Fuck no, Fuck no, Fuck no!
They couldn't FUCKING EXECUTE A FUCKING GAWD DAMN FUCKING FIELD GOAL FROM THE FUCKING FIVE YARD LINE? A Field Goal that they just spent three FUCKING MINUTES SETTING UP BY RUNNING STRAIGHT FUCKING INTO THE LINE SIX FUCKING TIMES WITH FUCKING TIGHT ENDS AND FUCKING ARENA LEAGUE BACKS? A field goal that was so FUCKING IMPORTANT THAT THEY COULDN'T FUCKING RISK THROWING ONE FUCKING PASS INTO THAT BIG FUCKING WIDE FUCKING OPEN END ZONE GUARDED BY FOURTH FUCKING STRING FUCKING RAMS CORNERFUCKINGBACKS? They couldn't execute THAT fucking field goal????
What the FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK?????????????????????????????!!!
Seriously ... what the Fuck?
Zombo
--Total Trap Game for the Jaguars this week, though.
Zombo said:
You mean this:
I haven't really gotten a chance to post my comments on last week's game because I've had to travel back, catch up with work, get over a hangover, get over a nasty cold, and, quite frankly, I couldn't put it into the proper words. I think I have found the words:
You fucking douchebag motherfucking cock suckers. How many Fucking times do I have to fucking fly to fucking Cleveland only to watch my favortite fucking team roll over like a bunch of mother fucking fems? Jeezus Fucking Kayrice how hard is it to score a fucking touchdown on the motherfucking St. Louis Rams? You've got a first down inside the fucking red zone and five and a fucking half minutes to go, down by two fucking points, and you run the fucking ball six mother fucking times? After you got downfield by passing the fucking ball? When you have a QB that rarely gets picked off and is having an accurate day on his home fucking field?
Well, maybe that's because we've got Jim Fucking Brown in the fucking backfield? No? What's that? We've got two motherfuckers who weren't even on a motherfucking NFL roster before the season? Well, then, here's a fucking idea: Instead of fucking throwing the fucking ball in the fucking end zone, why don't you fucking hand off to a fucking 3rd string fucking tight end who hasn't even PRACTICED taking a fucking hand off since he was in grade fucking school??? At least fucking admit after the fucking game that you fucking THOUGHT the fullback was in there when you called the fucking play, even though he got fucking injured right before your fucking eyes two plays earlier. And god forbid you give your fucking quarterback the fucking authortiy to change a fucking play when he gets a fucking playcall from the fucking sidelines telling him to hand off to the fucking tight end up the fucking middle on second and fucking goal from the fucking NINE! Worst fucking call in fucking history and no one had the fucking balls, or fucking guts, to fucking change it.
So I'm sitting there with my buddy Mark, who left his wife and two young boys in San Di Fucking ego to spend over a thousand fucking dollars traveling to Fucking Cleveland in Fucking November so that he can see his fucking boyhood favorite fucking team win a fucking football game in their own fucking stadium against a fucking 1-7 shitass Rams team. He didn't even look up his relatives he fucking came just to see his fellow fucking Browns fans and watch his fucking football team finally win a fucking game for him, since it had been ten fucking years since he actually saw them win on their own fucking field. Next to him is my buddy Keith, who flew from FUCKING SCOTLAND to watch the fucking Browns and hope they fucking win a game for him since he spends his fucking vacation coming to Cleveland to watch a Browns game every fucking year and thought it would be fucking nice if they actually fucking won at their home fucking field one fucking time. Behind me is a nice family rooting hard for the fucking Browns and sitting all together and screaming their fucking lungs out the whole fucking game so that they may also actually see a fucking win over a fucking pathetic piece of shit team. One of them is a young man that served TWO FUCKING TOURS OF DUTY IN FUCKING IRAQ and he wouldn't mind seeing the home fucking team beat the 1-7 fucking Tomato Cans for a fucking change. I mean, he put his fucking life on the fucking line for the country, and we don't have the fucking balls to throw one fucking pass toward the fucking end zone for him?
So we are fucking standing there in the fucking end zone fucking seating, just over the fucking visitors ramp with a perfect fucking view of the big, wide-fucking-open end zone. It is thirty feet fucking deep and 160 fucking feet fucking wide, and, with the invention of the forward fucking pass a fucking century ago, the fucking idea would be to fucking isolate one fucking trained fucking receiver and throw him the fucking ball which he has been practicing fucking catching for 20 fucking years (as opposed to fucking handing off to a fucking 270 lb oaf who hasn't seen a fucking handoff since he fucking played in his parents back yard twenty fucking years ago). Every fucking play there is a fucking receiver isolated at our end of the field. The fucking Rams are expecting us to fucking run at them. I say to Mark, "look Evan Moore is going to get the fucking ball right in front of us!" Fucking handoff. I say to Mark, "look Josh Cribbs is going to get the fucking ball right in front of us!" Fucking handoff. I say to Mark, "look Greg Little is going to get the fucking ball right in front of us!" Fucking handoff. YOU'VE GOT TO BE FUCKING KIDDING ME. Not one chance at the mother fucking end zone? It's RIGHT THERE. It's HUGE. We've got one-on-one coverage with the fucking Rams fourth string fucking corner. SIX MOTHERFUCKING HANDOFFS IN A ROW?
Well, after all that, all we fucking want is a fucking win. We don't care how fucking ugly or under-coached it is. I have been to this fucking stadium maybe a dozen fucking times since I last saw the fucking Browns win there in fucking 2000, which was the ONLY fucking time I have seen them fucking win IN THEIR OWN FUCKING STADIUM. Sure, I've seen them win in both fucking Jacksonville and fucking Miami since then, but would you FUCKING MIND WINNING A FUCKING GAME IN CLEVELAND FUCKING BROWN STADIUM for me ... and Mark ... and Keith ... and the nice family ... and the Vets ... and the 80,000 fucking people who are paying their hard-earned fucking money to see you beat the gawd-awful fucking Rams?? I even had Season Fucking Tickets, even though I live 1,300 fucking miles away, from 2001 to 2007 and NOT ONCE did I ever fucking see the fucking Cleveland Browns win a fucking football game in Cleveland Fucking Brown Stadium, even though I came up once or twice a year each time.
So, luckily, there are two fucking things a Browns fan can fucking count on: long-snapper fucking Bryan Pointbriand and kicker fucking Phil Dawson. Those fuckers are tried and true each and every fucking season while the rest of the fucking team fucking starts over every fucking year. If there is one fucking thing we can fucking do, it is snap a fucking football and fucking kick it through the fucking uprights. And our fucking defense is holding the fucking Rams pretty well, so we will take the the gimme fucking chip shot field goal and if we can keep the fucking Rams out of fucking field goal range for two fucking minutes we will finally win a fucking home fucking game that I fucking paid dearly to see.
Yet ... knowing those fucking guys are automatic, and this was a fucking "chippie" ... I still fucking found myself mouthing a "Hail Mary" to myself as the Browns set up for that fucking field goal, because I had fucking seen too many things. We all had fucken seen too many fucken things. As if she cared. She's got starving children and fucking pedophiles running around, why pray about football? Because it's THE CLEVELAND FUCKING BROWNS and EVERY FUCKING WEEK I TELL EVERYBODY HOW FUCKING PROUD I AM TO BE A CLEVELAND FUCKING BROWNS FAN and COULD THEY JUST FUCKING ONCE, MOTHERFUCKING ONCE, PUT SOMEBODY THE FUCK AWAY IN FRONT OF MY OWN FUCKING EYES??
Selfish, I know. That's the thought I had as I watched in unspeakable fucking horror as the ball slowly fucking dribbled back to poor fucking Maynard, the fucking holder. He did his fucking best to get it fucking upright but by then the fucking enemy was breaking through and fucking Phil's timing was off. But still ... I hear a "BOOM" ... Fucking Phil blasts the ball, we all look over, there is a brief cheer .. followed by the biggest, longest, saddest, motherfucking groan you will ever fucking hear.
Not fucking again.
Fuck no, Fuck no, Fuck no!
They couldn't FUCKING EXECUTE A FUCKING GAWD DAMN FUCKING FIELD GOAL FROM THE FUCKING FIVE YARD LINE? A Field Goal that they just spent three FUCKING MINUTES SETTING UP BY RUNNING STRAIGHT FUCKING INTO THE LINE SIX FUCKING TIMES WITH FUCKING TIGHT ENDS AND FUCKING ARENA LEAGUE BACKS? A field goal that was so FUCKING IMPORTANT THAT THEY COULDN'T FUCKING RISK THROWING ONE FUCKING PASS INTO THAT BIG FUCKING WIDE FUCKING OPEN END ZONE GUARDED BY FOURTH FUCKING STRING FUCKING RAMS CORNERFUCKINGBACKS? They couldn't execute THAT fucking field goal????
What the FFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFFUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCCKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKKK?????????????????????????????!!!
Seriously ... what the Fuck?
Zombo
--Total Trap Game for the Jaguars this week, though.
Fucking love it!
-
Yep...
It was an instant classic and 5 months later it makes me laugh and cry at the same time.
-
Submit that and those demands to mr. Rutigliano on FB maybe he can get them where they need to go.
-
Zombo said:
LOL ... me too. I fogot about the family behind us. I think the Mom was into you.
Zombo
She only liked me because she liked my nuts....I mean she liked that I shared my nuts with her...I mean she only liked me because I had nuts to share..wait..that's not right either.
I bought peanuts and was sharing them with everyone and nothing at all happened.
-
Submit that and those demands to mr. Rutigliano on FB maybe he can get them where they need to go.
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