Welfare Office - The Lbj Syndrome
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Liberals don't get it, but they like the dependent votes.
Conservatives and Independents see it for what it is - a disgrace we cannot afford to keep funding more and more of.
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Welfare Office - Terri and Terry
A WOMAN WALKS INTO THE DOWNTOWN WELFARE OFFICE, TRAILED BY 15 KIDS.
'WOW,' THE SOCIAL WORKER EXCLAIMS, 'ARE THEY ALL YOURS?"
'YEP, THEY ARE ALL MINE,' THE FLUSTERED MOMMA SIGHS, HAVING HEARD THAT QUESTION
A THOUSAND TIMES BEFORE.
SHE SAYS, 'SIT DOWN TERRY.' ALL THE CHILDREN RUSH TO FIND SEATS.
'WELL,' SAYS THE SOCIAL WORKER, 'THEN YOU MUST BE HERE TO SIGN UP. I'LL NEED ALL
YOUR CHILDREN'S NAMES.'
''WELL, TO KEEP IT SIMPLE, THE BOYS ARE ALL NAMED TERRY AND THE GIRLS ARE ALL
NAMED TERRI."
IN DISBELIEF, THE CASE WORKER SAYS, 'ARE YOU SERIOUS? THEY'RE ALL NAMED TERRY?'
THEIR MOMMA REPLIED, 'WELL, YES-IT MAKES IT EASIER. WHEN IT'S TIME TO GET THEM
OUT OF BED AND READY FOR SCHOOL , I YELL, TERRY!' AN' WHEN IT'S TIME FOR DINNER,
I JUST YELL 'TERRY!' AND THEY ALL COME A RUNNING. AND IF I NEED TO STOP THE KID
WHO'S RUNNING INTO THE STREET, I JUST YELL 'TERRY' AND ALL OF THEM STOP. IT'S
THE SMARTEST IDEA I EVER HAD, NAMING THEM ALL TERRY.'
THE SOCIAL WORKER THINKS THIS OVER FOR A BIT, THEN WRINKLES HER FOREHEAD AND
SAYS TENTATIVELY, 'BUT WHAT IF YOU JUST WANT ONE KID TO COME, AND NOT THE WHOLE
BUNCH?'
'THEN I CALL THEM BY THEIR LAST NAMES.
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Substance
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