*** Time for a Divorce from Liberals ***
-
Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists
and Obama supporters, et al:
We have stuck together since the late 1950's, but the whole of this latest
election process has made me realize that I want a divorce. I know we
tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but
sadly, this relationship has run its course. Our two ideological sides of
America cannot and will not ever agree on what is right so let's just end it
on friendly terms. We can smile and chalk it up to irreconcilable
differences and go our own way.
Here is a model separation agreement:
Our two groups can equitably divide up this country by landmass each taking
a portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can
come to a friendly agreement. After that, it should be relatively easy! Our
respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both
sides have such distinct and disparate tastes.
We don't like redistributive taxes so you can keep them. You are welcome to
the liberal judges and the ACLU. Since you hate guns and war, we'll take our
firearms, the cops, the NRA and the military. You can keep Oprah, Michael
Moore and Rosie O'Donnell (You are, however, responsible for finding a
bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move all three of them).
We'll keep the capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies,
Wal-Mart and Wall Street.. You can have your beloved homeboys, hippies and
illegal aliens. We'll keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEO's and
rednecks. We'll keep the Bibles and give you NBC and Hollywood.
You can make nice with Iran and Palestine and we'll retain the right to
invade and hammer places that threaten us. You can have the peaceniks and
war protesters.
When our allies or our way of life are under assault, we'll help provide
them security.
We'll keep our Judeo-Christian values.. You are welcome to Islam,
Scientology, Humanism and Shirley McClain. You can also have the U.N.. but
we will no longer be paying the bill.
We'll keep the SUVs, pickup trucks and oversized luxury cars. You can take
every Volkswagon you can find.
We'll keep The Battle Hymn of the Republic and the National Anthem. I'm sure
you'll be happy to substitute Imagine, I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing,
Kum Ba Ya or We Are the World.
We'll practice trickle down economics and you can give trickle up poverty
your best shot. Since it often so offends you, we'll keep our history, our
name and our flag.
Would you agree to this? If so, please pass it along to other like minded
liberal and conservative patriots and if you do not agree, just hit delete.
In the spirit of friendly parting, I'll bet you which one of us will need
whose help in 15 years.
Sincerely,
John J. Wall
Law Student and an American
P.S. Also, please take Barbara Streisand & Jane Fonda with you.
Very Nice!
Head or Gut? -
gay
-
Dear American liberals, leftists, social progressives, socialists, Marxists
and Obama supporters, et al:
We have stuck together since the late 1950's, but the whole of this latest
election process has made me realize that I want a divorce. I know we
tolerated each other for many years for the sake of future generations, but
sadly, this relationship has run its course. Our two ideological sides of
America cannot and will not ever agree on what is right so let's just end it
on friendly terms. We can smile and chalk it up to irreconcilable
differences and go our own way.
Here is a model separation agreement:
Our two groups can equitably divide up this country by landmass each taking
a portion. That will be the difficult part, but I am sure our two sides can
come to a friendly agreement. After that, it should be relatively easy! Our
respective representatives can effortlessly divide other assets since both
sides have such distinct and disparate tastes.
We don't like redistributive taxes so you can keep them. You are welcome to
the liberal judges and the ACLU. Since you hate guns and war, we'll take our
firearms, the cops, the NRA and the military. You can keep Oprah, Michael
Moore and Rosie O'Donnell (You are, however, responsible for finding a
bio-diesel vehicle big enough to move all three of them).
We'll keep the capitalism, greedy corporations, pharmaceutical companies,
Wal-Mart and Wall Street.. You can have your beloved homeboys, hippies and
illegal aliens. We'll keep the hot Alaskan hockey moms, greedy CEO's and
rednecks. We'll keep the Bibles and give you NBC and Hollywood.
You can make nice with Iran and Palestine and we'll retain the right to
invade and hammer places that threaten us. You can have the peaceniks and
war protesters.
When our allies or our way of life are under assault, we'll help provide
them security.
We'll keep our Judeo-Christian values.. You are welcome to Islam,
Scientology, Humanism and Shirley McClain. You can also have the U.N.. but
we will no longer be paying the bill.
We'll keep the SUVs, pickup trucks and oversized luxury cars. You can take
every Volkswagon you can find.
We'll keep The Battle Hymn of the Republic and the National Anthem. I'm sure
you'll be happy to substitute Imagine, I'd Like to Teach the World to Sing,
Kum Ba Ya or We Are the World.
We'll practice trickle down economics and you can give trickle up poverty
your best shot. Since it often so offends you, we'll keep our history, our
name and our flag.
Would you agree to this? If so, please pass it along to other like minded
liberal and conservative patriots and if you do not agree, just hit delete.
In the spirit of friendly parting, I'll bet you which one of us will need
whose help in 15 years.
Sincerely,
John J. Wall
Law Student and an American
P.S. Also, please take Barbara Streisand & Jane Fonda with you.
Very Nice!
-
What next ? An email from a Man from Nigeria who wants to bring 2 million dollars to the US and wants my bank Account to deposit it in and as a token of my help he will give me 25 % out of that 2 million ?
Hello! It looks like you're interested in this conversation, but you don't have an account yet.
Getting fed up of having to scroll through the same posts each visit? When you register for an account, you'll always come back to exactly where you were before, and choose to be notified of new replies (either via email, or push notification). You'll also be able to save bookmarks and upvote posts to show your appreciation to other community members.
With your input, this post could be even better 💗
Register Login