What’s The Worst Band Name, Like, Ever?
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What’s The Worst Band Name, Like, Ever?
Posted Fri Nov 21, 2008 3:16pm PST by Martin Aston in The MOJO Blog
Puddle Of Mudd? Toad The Wet Sprocket? Or one of those terrible emo groups called things like Car Parked Selfishly or Boy Raised By Chimps? Martin Aston referees MOJO's Terrible Band Name Smackdown.
What's in a band name? An explanation, a badge, a cri de coeur? A window, perhaps, onto an artist's soul. Those most cherished of acts have a name indivisible from their DNA--The Velvet Underground, Led Zeppelin, The New York Dolls, The Smiths, The Clash. I only mention this because I was recently sent an EP from Surrey emo band, You Me At Six--arguably as pointless a band name as it gets. It made me think of Manic Street Preachers Nicky Wire's rant against mimsy shoegazers Slowdive--"worse than Hitler," he opined.
Lazy art can get to you like that. Now, I know there can only be one Beatles, one Mercury Rev, one ...And You Will Know Us By The Trail Of Dead. But with the entire lexicon at their fingertips, You Me At Six is clearly not a band name that looks to the stars. Unlike, say, the enlightening They Came From The Stars, I Saw Them--themselves victims of Crappy Band Name hate blogs I encountered while researching this monograph.
Shoegaze was defined by its one-word band names--Blur, Lush, Ride, Spin. Repetitive, yes, but you can see the intention: to mirror the music's gauzy textures. At the other end of the bluster spectrum, emo band names extol the art of saying nothing, importantly: Christie Front Drive, Bring Me The Horizon, Hot Water Music, Dogs Die In Hot Cars--make up your own shameful version at The Emo Band Name Generator.
At least an inexcusable name can be constructive. I know without hearing a note that I'll never enjoy Scouting For Girls or The Pigeon Detectives. A flick through a gig guide last week turned up the following bands that I can happily avoid--Apples For Everyone, Nothing Rhymes With Orange, Bill Posters Will Be Band, My Tiger My Timing.
Chronic monikers can also be intriguing. Had I not known indie feys Grab Grab The Haddock, winners of BBC Radio #1's Worst Band Name poll of 2003, I'd have wondered what music deserved such risible baggage. Runners-up were Spandau Ballet, which expertly nailed New Romantic pretension, while the fact Crispy Ambulance came third also shows how the crux of a great name escapes some folk.
I haven't even begun to recount the horrors of the goth/industrial scene (hi, Anaal Nathrakh! you are named after a spell uttered by the wizard Merlin in John Boorman's 1981 film Excalibur that means "serpent's breath"). But it's not only rock; rap has its share of name shame. Calling yourself after a cotton bud, Q-Tip? Chali 2na, what were you thinking?
News just in: Nickel Eye is the solo project of The Strokes' bassist Nikolai Fraiture. From names sunk by puns to those calculated to annoy (Does It Offend You, Yeah?) and unintentionally induce yawns (sorry, The Milk & Honey Band), there are many reasons to get riled. I haven't decided which category the following fit into, but I know, on a cranky day, they're worse than Hitler: Puddle Of Mudd. Cherry Poppin' Daddies. Baboon Torture Division. Enuff Z'Nuff. Bowling For Soup. Dysfunkshun Junkshun. Mr Mister. Toad The Wet Sprocket. Crazy Town. The Hobbits Of The Shire. Keane. Come share some healthy anger and let MOJO know your worst.
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About any band from the 80's, ie Dexys Midnight Runners, Wang Chung, Men Without Hats, Flock of Seagulls, Seymour Takes the Wheel etc.
Best name ever?
Slayer
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@hiwaygal said:
Now I thought for sure the best name was Bare Naked Ladies!!! LOL!Worst name...I thought some of the names of the 50's groups were pretty stupid. The Platters, The Moonglows...they were all trying to follow some formula and I guess they were. At least some of the other names mentioned here needed some creativity or something.
yah the 50s stuff ..very silly...but they could not be edgy back then as the explosion was just beginning
The the! hah..i thought of them..as it is a band name that is whacky but they produced some great new wave synth tunes like "Its my life" covered in 2002ish by No Doubt...so i give them a pass.
how about art rock band "And you will know us by the trail of dead" http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/%E2%80%A6And_...ead...hmm..just because of the stupid weird name i have always turned them off...they my have talent...who cares.
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Question: What did the dude at the Grateful Dead concert say when his acid trip wore off?
Answer: This band sucks!
Cool album covers, a crowd more interesting than the band and music.
45 years and counting... -
Danny Elfman, the main guy behind Oingo Boingo, is like THE major player in Hollywood as far as film scores go. He certainly parlayed his minimal 80's success into an awesome career. I'll always love Oingo Boingo for Goodbye Goodbye from the Fast Times At Ridgemont High soundtrack. I could watch that movie 100 times a year and not get sick of it.
Doug
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Danny Elfman, the main guy behind Oingo Boingo, is like THE major player in Hollywood as far as film scores go. He certainly parlayed his minimal 80's success into an awesome career. I'll always love Oingo Boingo for Goodbye Goodbye from the Fast Times At Ridgemont High soundtrack. I could watch that movie 100 times a year and not get sick of it.
Doug
Danny Elfman, the main guy behind Oingo Boingo, is like THE major player in Hollywood as far as film scores go. He certainly parlayed his minimal 80's success into an awesome career. I'll always love Oingo Boingo for Goodbye Goodbye from the Fast Times At Ridgemont High soundtrack. I could watch that movie 100 times a year and not get sick of it.
Doug
DITTO!
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Mungo Jerry
Mr. Mister
Mott the Hoople
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You are soo correct about elfman and of course the boingo..
oddly he quit doing the band thing because of the touring and he had a live performance anxiety thing..sucks because while thye have a silly name..they had some great zany tunes...dead mans party my fav to spin at halloween
and if you are a tim burton fan...i am on the fence..but watch his movies because he ALWAYS uses elfman
best score..dont laugh ...pee wees big adventure..the music gives it a adult ...odd..scary..intense vibe..
checj it out..but burtons films would be total crap without the elf man.
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Question: What did the dude at the Grateful Dead concert say when his acid trip wore off?
Answer: This band sucks!
Cool album covers, a crowd more interesting than the band and music.
Question: What did the dude at the Grateful Dead concert say when his acid trip wore off?
Answer: This band sucks!
Cool album covers, a crowd more interesting than the band and music.
I don't know some of their straight forward pop stuff off the ALBUMS is pretty good. Went to about 10 dead shows. I went in the first time, sold my ticket the other ticket 9 times. Even under the influence, it was not that good. Now go see a Kiss concert on acid, the funniest thing in your life. I couldn't stop laughing for 3 straight hours. Their shows are so ridiculous their is nothing else to do but laugh. Kiss are piss poor musicians.
Oh the name
The Alan Parsons Project
Luck is Tim Couch. Big, Dumb Goofy, slow thinking QB - Ghoolie, 2-28-12 -
Eek a mouse is a sh*tty name.
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Danny Elfman, the main guy behind Oingo Boingo, is like THE major player in Hollywood as far as film scores go. He certainly parlayed his minimal 80's success into an awesome career. I'll always love Oingo Boingo for Goodbye Goodbye from the Fast Times At Ridgemont High soundtrack. I could watch that movie 100 times a year and not get sick of it.
Doug
Danny Elfman, the main guy behind Oingo Boingo, is like THE major player in Hollywood as far as film scores go. He certainly parlayed his minimal 80's success into an awesome career. I'll always love Oingo Boingo for Goodbye Goodbye from the Fast Times At Ridgemont High soundtrack. I could watch that movie 100 times a year and not get sick of it.
Doug
ahhh the mystic knights of the oingo boingo........actually Danny's brother Richard's original incarnation.
i just watched the FoRBiddEN zone this week lol. speak of the devil.
the film marks the moment he took over the band, and explains where it was now heading. Danny also parlayed his genes into a beautiful daughter Jenna of Dharma and Greg fame.
Nick, given the band's full name can the artist get a pass?
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Question: What did the dude at the Grateful Dead concert say when his acid trip wore off?
Answer: This band sucks!
Cool album covers, a crowd more interesting than the band and music.
Question: What did the dude at the Grateful Dead concert say when his acid trip wore off?
Answer: This band sucks!
Cool album covers, a crowd more interesting than the band and music.
album covers? fans more interesting than the band? any deadhead worth the mud between his toes knows it's all about bootlegs w/ the Dead.
you obviously know nothing about them. if you're interested start by googling "the wall of sound" and finish by understanding that in 35 years they never played the same song the same way twice.
cool album covers.......wow.
maybe pick up a tom wolfe book too.
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Question: What did the dude at the Grateful Dead concert say when his acid trip wore off?
Answer: This band sucks!
Cool album covers, a crowd more interesting than the band and music.
I don't know some of their straight forward pop stuff off the ALBUMS is pretty good. Went to about 10 dead shows. I went in the first time, sold my ticket the other ticket 9 times. Even under the influence, it was not that good. Now go see a Kiss concert on acid, the funniest thing in your life. I couldn't stop laughing for 3 straight hours. Their shows are so ridiculous their is nothing else to do but laugh. Kiss are piss poor musicians.
Oh the name
The Alan Parsons Project
I don't know some of their straight forward pop stuff off the ALBUMS is pretty good. Went to about 10 dead shows. I went in the first time, sold my ticket the other ticket 9 times. Even under the influence, it was not that good. Now go see a Kiss concert on acid, the funniest thing in your life. I couldn't stop laughing for 3 straight hours. Their shows are so ridiculous their is nothing else to do but laugh. Kiss are piss poor musicians.
Oh the name
The Alan Parsons Project
straight forward pop stuff?
it's a little known fact that the dead single-handedly kept salvation armies and soup kitchens alive through tough times. they would donate to approx. a 50 mile range surrounding each show they did, positively affecting huge areas. they wanted no publicity for this, the same went for their music.
the entire In The Dark album was recorded in an entirely pitch-black studio, hence the name. fun fact: this was after Jerry's stroke-he had no recollection of his former self and had to completely relearn to sing and play from scratch. although this album had some success with touch of gray, and truckin, casey jones, and sugar mag get radio play this band had no pop tunes. those songs rank overwhelmingly low with all deadheads, possibly for those reasons.
try these:
scarlet>>fire
china-ryder
aiko-aiko
he's gone
althea
their name was chosen by flipping open a dictionary and pointing.....and there was grateful dead. so maybe they deserve to be included in this thread, but their music is certainly not on trial. execs can only dream of a band having a following like the Dead have.
btw, they're touring this year. maybe try them sober this time Kosar...........or just get ur sheets from the lot and head home, whatever ur thing is.
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i have some coworkers in the band the jumpin' bald headed jesus, or JBHJ for short. i still haven't decided if it genius or.....other.
one of my favorite bands from the 90's, rage against the machine deserve this list for falling off and putting down the torch.
where'd ya go guys? we need you now more than ever. here we are!
other bad names? anything currently playing on pop radio. especially emo. sorry, no gems to share. maybe Rusted Root? nah, i'm just picking on pittsburgh.
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Question: What did the dude at the Grateful Dead concert say when his acid trip wore off?
Answer: This band sucks!
Cool album covers, a crowd more interesting than the band and music.
album covers? fans more interesting than the band? any deadhead worth the mud between his toes knows it's all about bootlegs w/ the Dead.
you obviously know nothing about them. if you're interested start by googling "the wall of sound" and finish by understanding that in 35 years they never played the same song the same way twice.
cool album covers.......wow.
maybe pick up a tom wolfe book too.
any deadhead worth the mud between his toes knows it's all about bootlegs w/ the Dead.
I'm a huge fan and NEVER listen to the studio stuff. Same goes for Phish...it's all about the live shows.
Luckily, with all of the Dick's Picks etc, we have a shitload of high quality soundboard stuff.
Between Dick's Picks soundboards and all of the aud stuff I got from archive.org before they "closed it down," amongst other stuff, I have like every show from May '77, which was like the epitome of live music.
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Hootie and the Blowfish.
Something about that name bothers me to no end. Could you imagine a band like Led Zepplin being called "Hootie and Blowfish"?
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Flash in the Pan...yep, that was their name; they had a so-called hit in the early 80's called Heh St. Peter.
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