Avengers endgame review
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Avengers Endgame
Marvel Disney
PG 13. 181 minHi gang. Hey I apologize for foisting yet another superhero extravaganza on you in the same issue, but the two are at opposite ends ends of the month and Avengers endgame looks to be the biggest box office opening have a history of, oh hell, the universe.
I think this is number four, maybe, with AVENGERS, AVENGERS 2 AGE OF ULTRON, AVENGERS INFINITY WAR and now AVENGERS ENDGAME (working title AVENGERS INFINITY WAR 2.) Apparently CAPTAIN AMERICA THE FIRST AVENGER didn’t make the cut for the official Marvel list of films about a team of superheroes saving the universe. Like most Marvel Comics and characters, these guys are imitations of DC Comics and The Avengers are Stan Lee’s version of the Justice League of America. Well they say imitation is the sincerest form of flattery and I have to admit Stan Lee is certainly a man of great stature in this industry and has done an outstanding job with his less than original characters. One would think that a film just over 3 hours long would require a synopsis of many pages but unfortunately the story isn’t really all that interesting. If you have followed this series at all you will remember Thanos the space goon with big plans for the universe. Like many dystopian tales the Earth (and I’m guessing everything else) is overpopulated leading to shortages famines war Etc. Thanos figures that if he could just destroy half the people in the universe the few remaining we get along better. Well we all know what happens when you assume but the big fella proceed with this plan anyway. Of course destroying half the people in the universe is a pretty tall order and he will need so extra help in the form of a bunch of magical or extraterrestrial or both magic blue crystals. Yes the very same stupid magic crystals they have bored me with all the way through every other AVENGERS movie and BLACK PANTHER.
That’s tough luck for the good guys because Thanos has already wiped out half the universe. 5 years ago. To make matters worse he also destroy the crystals and has assumed room temperature by way of decapitation at the hands of Thor.
I have no problem suspending reality in any kind of science fiction so when the solution, building a time machine, pops into the mind of a doctor Banner I figured hey that could work. One thing has changed in recent history and that is that somebody has found a way to merge the Hulk and dr. Banner into one being as big and strong as the Hulk and as intelligent and well-spoken as Doctor B. So the plan is, with the help of the time machine, each of the superheroes involved has to go back 5 years in time and seek out a magic crystal, bring them all back and put them all together for enough power to destroy Thanos, who I thought was already dead, and his army of monsters. This, of course, will bring back everybody who has been disintegrated. Actually this setup is a tedious process but I’m going to give the film a grade a little bit higher than what would be reflected by my enjoyment. I was honestly bored through most of it, but like listening to Yngwie Malmsteen’s Arpeggios From Hell; the music isn’t particularly enjoyable, you can’t help but be astounded by the sheer virtuosity. That’s how this is. It truly is a gigantic production. Sadly even with three hours it’s almost impossible to stay focused on most of the sub stories (some feuding members need to reconcile, one member has to die, the comic relief of Rocket Raccoon and a fat drunk Thor, Thanos and his daughters problems and more) so the producers are forced to trim them down to their cores which eliminates much, but not all of the empathy building opportunities. And I give them props for their effort as the first two hours or so are dedicated to trying to build those stories before the inevitable Battle Royale of noise explosions and blowing shit up.
Even when that happens it’s not as bad as most because every Marvel hero, and there are a slew of them, shows up for the final scene and that’s kind of fun.
This is the polar opposite of LORD OF THE RINGS which tried to pack so much story into so little time the AVENGERS ENDGAME needs to stretch out some very slim plot pickins over a lot of movies and many miles of celluloid film. But it is a huge an impressive accomplishment and I give them credit for that. Not to mention the almost endless list of stars who have signed on for this epic. And, sadly enough, Stan Lee’s last cameo.
I didn’t love it, didn’t even really like it that much, but for the sheer ambition…
B-
WSS
- By the way don’t bother sitting through the entire list of credits, there is no Kizer this time.
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