Halloween kills review
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Halloween kills
Universal
R. 106 min
Okay okay it's a horror movie. Halloween was just a few days ago and some people love them even though for the most part I think they suck. Not because horror movies suck as a genre but because every groundbreaking monster movie spawns dozens cheap imitations rushed to the screen tricking the fans to rake in a handful of treats. And let's be honest they aren't that expensive to make; the cast is rarely made up of Academy Award recipients and the plots aren’t necessarily Shakespeare. My old friend Big Al who I've known since he was a kid has a very simple criteria. Does the blood look fake and is there any frontal nudity? Judging from an iconic point of view there are certainly modern horror films that are landmarks in the genre. Just like FRANKENSTEIN THE MUMMY THE WOLFMAN DRACULA et al, Freddy Jason and Michael Myers are modern-day classics The never ending sequels; not so much.
So we all know the HALLOWEEN hook. Michael Myers is a deranged super strong seemingly indestructible psycho Killer. And like the James Bond series the Halloween Saga ages naturally. Young hot debutante Jamie Lee Curtis is now an old woman. Give her credit for having the stones to appear as such. Michaels victims that didn't actually die have grown up and still live in the same small Illinois town. One thing that makes HALLOWEEN KILLS a slight step up the Ladder from most retreads is the fact that after 41 years they've brought back as many actors from the original as they could. Sure, not many of them have aged well and apparently most haven't done any acting over the last 41 years but still that's kind of cool.
So what we have is the run of the mill Mayhem the fans have loved over the decades. One of the most annoying things about any monster movie is that the idiot townspeople will always leave the monster for dead at some point. We haven't been fooled by this trick since we were in Middle School. Speaking of not being fooled the producers actually tried to add a couple of twists to the latest incarnation. First a lunatic has broken out of the local nut house and he’s on the loose. For some reason a vigilante group gets it into their heads that he's been responsible for the murders over the last many years (Which he pretty obviously isn't) and everybody goes directly into pitchfork and torches mode. By the way that's another truism about horror movies. The townspeople are idiots. For instance when the goon is actually unconscious nobody ever thinks to just cut off his head. They leave him where he is and guess what?
But don't worry, if this is your cup of tea you'll get plenty of it. It is what it is, but at least let me shout out to my friend Big Al. There is no frontal nudity but the Blood looks pretty authentic.
D+
WSS
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