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  3. The Football Gods Demand a Sarcrifice.

The Football Gods Demand a Sarcrifice.

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  • . .mz

    @blowe said:

    What exactly does this sacrifice involve, and will there be cake?

    OK, eternal infamy, Browns success and cake.

    ATENEARS ATENEARSA Founder In Memoriam
    • 4k Posts
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    ATENEARSA ATENEARS wrote on last edited by
    #9

    @.mz said:

    OK, eternal infamy, Browns success and cake.

    Cake? Cool I'm in ... I have the munchies anyhow....

    . 1 Reply Last reply
    Quote Reply
    • ATENEARSA ATENEARS

      @.mz said:

      OK, eternal infamy, Browns success and cake.

      Cake? Cool I'm in ... I have the munchies anyhow....

      .mz .
      • 120 Posts
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      . .mz wrote on last edited by
      #10

      @atenears said:

      Cool I'm in

      Ladies/gents...I believe we have our first candidate, and it's a DOOZY.

      In deference to our Faithful Leader, I'll let him defer his official application until tomorrow.

      L 1 Reply Last reply
      Quote Reply
      • . .mz

        @atenears said:

        Cool I'm in

        Ladies/gents...I believe we have our first candidate, and it's a DOOZY.

        In deference to our Faithful Leader, I'll let him defer his official application until tomorrow.

        lemosley01 L
        • 689 Posts
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        L lemosley01 wrote on last edited by
        #11

        @.mz said:

        Ladies/gents...I believe we have our first candidate, and it's a DOOZY.

        In deference to our Faithful Leader, I'll let him defer his official application until tomorrow.

        Pussy. Do it! Do it before he changes his mind!

        1 Reply Last reply
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        • Mr. T Mr. TM
          • 7k Posts
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          Mr. TM Mr. T wrote on last edited by
          #12

          I thought they had to be a virgin?

          Head or Gut?
          BUNSofSTEEL08B ATENEARSA 2 Replies Last reply
          Quote Reply
          • Mr. TM Mr. T

            I thought they had to be a virgin?

            BUNSofSTEEL08 BUNSofSTEEL08B
            • 2k Posts
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            BUNSofSTEEL08B BUNSofSTEEL08 wrote on last edited by
            #13

            @mr.-t said:

            I thought they had to be a virgin?

            Well I assume ANTEATERS has never had sex with a WOMAN. Doesn't that count ??

            ; ~ )

            Climbing the Stairway...To SEVEN !!
            1 Reply Last reply
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            • . .mz

              @blowe said:

              What exactly does this sacrifice involve, and will there be cake?

              OK, eternal infamy, Browns success and cake.

              JC J
              • 257 Posts
              • 0 Reputation
              J JC wrote on last edited by
              #14

              @.mz said:

              OK, eternal infamy, Browns success and cake.

              What kind of cake? Chocolate, white, yellow, marble? It's got to be some pretty damn good cake...maybe red velvet?

              G 1 Reply Last reply
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              • J JC

                @.mz said:

                OK, eternal infamy, Browns success and cake.

                What kind of cake? Chocolate, white, yellow, marble? It's got to be some pretty damn good cake...maybe red velvet?

                grimmreaper3 G
                • 91 Posts
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                G grimmreaper3 wrote on last edited by
                #15

                @jc said:

                What kind of cake? Chocolate, white, yellow, marble? It's got to be some pretty damn good cake...maybe red velvet?

                1 Reply Last reply
                Quote Reply
                • Mr. TM Mr. T

                  I thought they had to be a virgin?

                  ATENEARS ATENEARSA Founder In Memoriam
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                  ATENEARSA ATENEARS wrote on last edited by
                  #16

                  @mr.-t said:

                  I thought they had to be a virgin?

                  Virgin .. cool? Where do I sign, man?

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                  • .mz .
                    • 120 Posts
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                    . .mz wrote on last edited by
                    #17

                    @inspecta said:

                    Man, we've reached new levels of desperation.....

                    Exactly.

                    Just remember, folks, the Cardinals went from obscurity to Super Bowl with a Sacrifice.

                    Now let's get these apps in.........

                    1 Reply Last reply
                    Quote Reply
                    • Thomas5737 T
                      • 167 Posts
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                      T Thomas5737 wrote on last edited by
                      #18

                      I believe the Gods would want the sacrificed to be thrown into the mouth of an active volcano, at least thats what I learned in history class... or maybe it was Gilligan's Island. Either way.

                      . 1 Reply Last reply
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                      • ndneighbor N
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                        N ndneighbor wrote on last edited by
                        #19

                        Obviously mz the pussy found some good stuff to ingest in some fashion.

                        Here's an appropriate stand in pic for Anteater's application: aardvark1.jpg Yeah. Toss that in the volcano. Quick, before he sobers up.

                        1 Reply Last reply
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                        • T Thomas5737

                          I believe the Gods would want the sacrificed to be thrown into the mouth of an active volcano, at least thats what I learned in history class... or maybe it was Gilligan's Island. Either way.

                          .mz .
                          • 120 Posts
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                          . .mz wrote on last edited by
                          #20

                          @thomas5737 said:

                          I believe the Gods would want the sacrificed to be thrown into the mouth of an active volcano, at least thats what I learned in history class...

                          Well......yeah. You know, I'll be playing Rip Torn's role in Beastmaster.

                          1 Reply Last reply
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                          • bonedawg B
                            • 847 Posts
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                            B bonedawg wrote on last edited by
                            #21

                            Don't we also need a lock of hair from Quinn's wavy mane?

                            . 1 Reply Last reply
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                            • B bonedawg

                              Don't we also need a lock of hair from Quinn's wavy mane?

                              .mz .
                              • 120 Posts
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                              . .mz wrote on last edited by
                              #22

                              @bonedawg said:

                              Don't we also need a lock of hair from Quinn's wavy mane?

                              YES!

                              Or a Derek Anderson size 45 shoe, if you prefer.

                              1 Reply Last reply
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                              • . .mz

                                @brownindian said:

                                Lets sacrifice .mz the pussy. To get the best result we need to sacrifice the most intelligent Browns fan.

                                Perhaps you need to re-read the instructions, because you seem like a decent candidate..

                                Again...you must submit yourself (or else everyone would be submitting Lumbergh, and since he isn't even a Browns Fan the Gods will not look favorably upon his selection anyway).

                                You are correct about the intelligence part, however.

                                Tobalaz T
                                • 543 Posts
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                                T Tobalaz wrote on last edited by
                                #23

                                @.mz said:

                                Perhaps you need to re-read the instructions, because you seem like a decent candidate..

                                Again...you must submit yourself (or else everyone would be submitting Lumbergh, and since he isn't even a Browns Fan the Gods will not look favorably upon his selection anyway).

                                You are correct about the intelligence part, however.

                                Well, can we dress up like Steeler and Raven fans and see if we can draw bad karma upon those teams with an unwilling sacrifice of DA, Lums and Quinn?

                                3 seasons until our new head coach, let's hope they get it right this time.
                                1 Reply Last reply
                                Quote Reply
                                • . .mz

                                  Look, friends. I'm not going to lie to you, it's probably going to get worse before it gets better. And you may ask how it could possibly get worse after today's stillbirth, and I maintain it certainly can. I mean, we could lay this egg against someone like the Bengals or Raiders or Chiefs, and that'll be really embarrassing. More embarrassing than this, I assure you. So before April 2010 when Randy Lerner whips it out and spooges directly in our collective face with "his" selection of Sam Bradford #1, we need to do something to at least semi-right this sinking ship. Because if we end up with the 1st pick, Lerner's 100% going QB (because he's a fcuking Retard), which means we'll be having this conversation (again) three years from now. And that my friends will SUCK BALLS.

                                  In that case, what are we to do? How do we avoid this terrible situation? It's all-too-clear Mangini, Quinn, Anderson et al. have no interest in helping us avoid the dastardly #1 pick/face spooge. They're busy throwing picks and fining guys for "stealing" water. Who's left, then? Rogers? Right. Edwards? See Rogers. Jamal Lewis? See Tommy Vardell. Then WHO??? It has to then be The Football Gods, that's who. They can right any ship out there. Just ask the Cardinals. Their message board reportedly sacrificed a member (a Leinart "Fag") to the Football Gods early last season and subsequently made the Super Bowl. And they now demand a sacrifice from us, the loyal Browns Fans. That's unless you want to place your future in Mangini, Quinn, Anderson and Lerner's hands...

                                  OK. I've proven to be WAAAAAAY too valuable a member/resource here, so it's clearly not going to be me (much to the chagrin of clowns like DieHard). Plus, this idea was born from my genius. Anyway, I'll be looking for volunteers. All you need to do is, in this very thread, post 1) How long you've been a Browns fan 2) Your first name 3) What city you reside and 4) a sentence or two that would convince me to choose you as the Football Gods' sacrificial lamb. Ideally, I'd like all applications by Thursday or Friday, so we can get the sacrifice in by the time the Bungles game rolls around.

                                  And what's in it for you, the "sacrificial lamb" of the Browns Board? First, you'll absolutely live in infamy here (and everywhere Browns Fans reside, really) as the guy/gal who sacrificed his/her membership here for the betterment of the Browns. Also, you won't have to endure the drunken post-game whining from whiny Browns Board members.

                                  We, the Browns, need you!

                                  Please submit your applications below. I look forward to hearing from you.

                                  Mike

                                  (PS can some friendly mod sticky this??)

                                  DieHardBrownsFan DieHardBrownsFanD Conversation Starter Dedicated Reacting Well Very Popular Collaborator Posting Machine First Post One Month Later Week One Done One Year In
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                                  DieHardBrownsFanD DieHardBrownsFan wrote on last edited by
                                  #24

                                  @.mz said:

                                  Look, friends. I'm not going to lie to you, it's probably going to get worse before it gets better. And you may ask how it could possibly get worse after today's stillbirth, and I maintain it certainly can. I mean, we could lay this egg against someone like the Bengals or Raiders or Chiefs, and that'll be really embarrassing. More embarrassing than this, I assure you. So before April 2010 when Randy Lerner whips it out and spooges directly in our collective face with "his" selection of Sam Bradford #1, we need to do something to at least semi-right this sinking ship. Because if we end up with the 1st pick, Lerner's 100% going QB (because he's a fcuking Retard), which means we'll be having this conversation (again) three years from now. And that my friends will SUCK BALLS.

                                  In that case, what are we to do? How do we avoid this terrible situation? It's all-too-clear Mangini, Quinn, Anderson et al. have no interest in helping us avoid the dastardly #1 pick/face spooge. They're busy throwing picks and fining guys for "stealing" water. Who's left, then? Rogers? Right. Edwards? See Rogers. Jamal Lewis? See Tommy Vardell. Then WHO??? It has to then be The Football Gods, that's who. They can right any ship out there. Just ask the Cardinals. Their message board reportedly sacrificed a member (a Leinart "Fag") to the Football Gods early last season and subsequently made the Super Bowl. And they now demand a sacrifice from us, the loyal Browns Fans. That's unless you want to place your future in Mangini, Quinn, Anderson and Lerner's hands...

                                  OK. I've proven to be WAAAAAAY too valuable a member/resource here, so it's clearly not going to be me (much to the chagrin of REAL FANS like DieHard). Plus, this idea was born from my genius. Anyway, I'll be looking for volunteers. All you need to do is, in this very thread, post 1) How long you've been a Browns fan 2) Your first name 3) What city you reside and 4) a sentence or two that would convince me to choose you as the Football Gods' sacrificial lamb. Ideally, I'd like all applications by Thursday or Friday, so we can get the sacrifice in by the time the Bungles game rolls around.

                                  And what's in it for you, the "sacrificial lamb" of the Browns Board? First, you'll absolutely live in infamy here (and everywhere Browns Fans reside, really) as the guy/gal who sacrificed his/her membership here for the betterment of the Browns. Also, you won't have to endure the drunken post-game whining from whiny Browns Board members.

                                  We, the Browns, need you!

                                  Please submit your applications below. I look forward to hearing from you.

                                  Mike

                                  (PS can some friendly mod sticky this??)

                                  What a gay idea, look who came up with it. No surprise there. It would have to be someone who would actually honor their commitment, unlike the OP who cant live with out his post count and number of dashes below his name. ROFLMAO.

                                  "You planning on having a long relationship with that glass or are you going to drink it? Drink up, man. Maybe we can get another.” - Janis Joplin, 1970.
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                                  • .mz .
                                    • 120 Posts
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                                    . .mz wrote on last edited by
                                    #25

                                    I guess cleaning latrines for thirty years robbed DieHard of his sense of humor.

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                                    • .mz .
                                      • 120 Posts
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                                      . .mz wrote on last edited by
                                      #26

                                      PS those things were given to me, I asked for NONE of it.

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